Hoodoo that Voodoo that you do so Well
by spectre666
Summary: Shego retrieves Monkey Fist's discarded book.  This cannot be good.
1. Chapter 1

Hoodoo that Voodoo

I.

Kim Possible, the girl who could do anything, walked down the halls of Middleton High, cheerfully greeting friends and acquaintances. That is, until she almost levitated into the air "_WooooHooooo_", before her feet regained the floor she had whirled and punched her attacker.

"Big Mike?!"

The oversize perennial inhabitant of detention stared back at her from the floor. "Cheerleader?" he manged fuzzily before his eyes rolled up and he passed out.

"Girl, why did you deck Big Mike?" Monique asked, leaning on Kim's shoulder, "That could be MDA."

Kim responded with a lost look.

"Major danger ahead. Girlfriend, the boy is not going to be happy."

All of Kim's fire returned, "Because he goosed me, that's why. And I have words for him when he wakes up."

Monique stroked her chin with one index finger, "Don't think so, Kim, I was watching, Mike had his books in one hand and was waving to Vinnie with the other. No way he did it."

"But...but Mike was the only one behind me!"

"Sure you weren't just dreaming about the BF again?" Monique grinned.

"NO, and besides, Ron doesn't touch...me...that..."Kim's face flared as she trailed off.

"And just how...woop, better think fast, Girl, he's waking up."

II.

"Shego, aren't you a little old to be playing with dolls?"

"Just venting my inner child, Doc, besides, this isn't just any old doll." She held the figurine out to her employer.

"You have a Kim Possible doll? Somehow, that is just disturbing."

"Not just a Kim Possible doll, Dr. D., a special doll."

"I don't get it."

"Remember when we went to the villain's end of summer bash in Cozumel?"

"Of course, and we are never going again. Stupid free sun block samples."

"Who knew it wouldn't work on blue skin? Anyway, the shade you turned was definitely a new look." The green villain snickered.

"Well why did it work on you?"

"News flash, Doc, I don't use freebies on this delicate skin, only the best. Besides, I thought I'd see how it worked on you first."

"Shego! You...you..."

"Skipping all the fun, ol' banana breath was there."

Regaining his temper, Drakken managed, "So?"

"He chunked a book in the trash, I heard him bitching about 'claptrap, no monkeys at all'. I was bored so I picked it up."

"And it was what?"

"A book on voodoo."

"I have to agree with Monty on this one, nonsense and superstition."

Shego grinned maliciously, "Doc, this was an old manuscript, written in french, and the author was Marie Lavou."

III.

Ron barely avoided the fist that came his way when he walked up behind his girlfriend at her locker. "Whoa, What did I do, what's that all about." He panicked.

Kim grabbed his shoulders and hugged him tight, pressing her lips to his neck in apology. "Sorry, Ronnie, this has just been a ferociously bad day."

Surprised, but accepting, Ron returned her hug two fold. "What's the matter, KP? Anything the Ronster can do."

"I don't think so, it's just..." Kim hesitated, blushing deeply. "People have been...touching...me all day."

"A huh. And this bothers you since when?"

"Ron, it's where they've been touching me." Ron's face showed he didn't understand. Kim, in frustration, shook him, "Not where people usually touch me."

"Yeah, and this is..." Ron's vacuum still wasn't filled.

Kim shook him harder, and blurted, "They've been goosing and groapping me, all right?" Kim ducked her head as she realized that had come out a little louder than she intended. She also hadn't intended for Ron's reaction to be quite so, intense.

"Who?" He whispered.

The whisper scared her more than a bellow would have. Ron's warm eyes had become ice. His fists white knuckled, his face pale with rage.

"Ron, calm down, Ron."

"Who?"

"It's not like that, Ron, really."

"Who?"

"Baby", Kim began to plead, "would you just forget it, it's no big."

"No. Who?" Ron's hand caressed her cheek reassuringly. "Tell me."

"No one."

Now Ron looked disbelieving.

"Really, Baby, I would get," Kim flushed, "goosed, and no one was there. No one."

Ron frowned.

"OK, except the first time, I decked Big Mike."

"Big Mike?" Ron gently removed Kim's hands from his shoulders, turning to leave.

"Nooo." Kim grabbed the back of Ron's jersey, "Ronnie, listen, Monique saw the whole thing but she swears it wasn't Mike, and so does he."

Ron turned back, "Then who?"

Kim shrugged helplessly.

IV.

"Marie...?"

"She was a famous Voodoo queen in New Orleans, Doctor D. Supposed to really know her stuff."

"And this doll is different, how?"

"I followed the formula, got some of Kimmie's hair, even some of her nail clippings. Did the chants, the whole nine yards."

"And you did this because...?"

"So sue me, I was bored, all right."

Drakken thought a moment, "I just have one question, does it work?"

Shego slumped, "No, I don't think so. I stuck a pin in her chest, but no reports of Kim Possible collapsing in school."

"So you're going to throw it away."

"Naw, it's fun, even if it doesn't work, better than filing my nails. For instance, picture if this worked." Shego drew a feather between the doll's legs. "Can you imagine little Miss Prim?"

V.

Ron was blissfully on the receiving end of a passionate, fiery kiss. He didn't know what he'd done, and he sure hoped he could figure it out so he could do it again.

"Ron, that was...when did you learn...ummmm."

VI.

"I mean, really, Doc, think of all the fun we could have with little Princess. Even if it isn't lethal, tomorrow's Halloween night, the night the ghosts and goblins come out to play. We could have Kimmie convinced she was haunted, probably drive her nuts."

An evil smile began to bloom on Dr. Drakken's face, "Let me see that book, Shego, this brings up some possibilities." He gave vent to his evil laugh.


	2. Chapter 2

Hoodoo that Voodoo that you do so well: Chapter two

I.

"Doc, you're out of focus again." Shego sighed, "The book is written in French."

"So?"

"So, doy, when did you learn to read French?"

"Oh, right, well...uh...you read it to me."

Shego's eyebrows arched in disbelief, "You are kidding, right? Tell me you're kidding, there's over a hundred hand written pages here."

"Well, could you at least translate the spell or incantation you used?" Drakken whined.

"Fine, whatever, let's see here." Shego began flipping pages, then settled down to translate her selection. "Oh boy, Doc, we may have a problem."

"How can we have a problem if it didn't work?"

"Right, right, well, even if it did work, it's only an aphrodisiac spell. The only thing it lets us do is sensual in nature."

Drakken snorted, "And you wasted your time, and more important, my time on this?"

"What waste?" Shego snorted, "Like you have anything planned."

"Oh, but I do, Shego, I do." Drakken rubbed his hands together, "I have to make my selection for tomorrow night."

"What's happening tomorrow night..." Her eyes widened in horror, "No, oh please no, Doc, not..."

"That's right, Shego. Halloween at Karaoke!"

II.

"No horse Ron."

"But, KP, I'll let you have the front."

"No, Ron."

"You want the back?" Ron asked in amazement.

"NO, Ron," Kim pulled her hair in frustration, "I don't want to be the horse's a...uh...rear any more than I want to be the front."

"But, Kim..." Ron whined.

"Ron," Kim turned to slide one arm around her BF's waist while the other played with his hair, "you've picked our costumes for the last three years. How about you let me pick them this year."

Ron's eyes widened, "KP, you're not gonna make me wear a tutu again, are you?"

Kim giggled, "Ron, we were six years old."

"Yeah," Ron grumped, "but it put puberty back two years."

Kim nuzzled Ron's cheek, "Maybe, but I think you're making up the loss." She did a slow bump and grind against her BF's pelvis.

"Uh...K...P...ah..."

"What about the costumes, Ron?"

"Costumes...what...uh..."

"I pick the costumes this year, pwetty pwease?" Kim semi pouted.

A silly grin grew on Ron's flushed face, "Costumes...you...yes...pick...you..."

"Thanks, Ronnie, you'll love it, promise." Kim reached up to place a quick peck on Ron's lips. "Now you go home while I set it up." She turned her still dazed friend and pushed him out her door. "Bye-by, baby."

Standing on the Possible porch, Ron shook his head like a horse with flies, "_How did I get out here? And what did I just agree to?"_

III.

"Monique! He agreed, I get to pick the costumes this year."

Kim's best girlfriend broke out in giggles, collapsing back on the bed. "Like there was really any doubt that Ron would do what you wanted?"

"Welll..."

"What did you do, the PDP?"

Kim began giggling herself, "I didn't have to go that far, just a little physical persuasion, that's all."

"You beat the boy up?" Monique gasped.

"No, of course not," Kim choked, "remember the little dance you told me about?" She stood and gave a little bump to demonstrate.

"The boy folded for just that,? Damn, he's weaker than I thought." Mo marveled.

"Ron is NOT weak, he's just...persuadable..."

"Yeah." Monique laughed, "You just be glad he's only 'persuadable' by you."

"I am, but I...sometimes...he just...I mean..."

"Spit it out Kim."

Kim nervously twisted a lock of hair around her finger, "What if he...I mean...maybe it's not just...maybe..."

"Are you seriously asking me if he could be 'persuaded' by another girl?"

"I, maybe, I just..."

"Girl, I've seen him blow off Bonnie before when she tried it."

Kim cheered up a little, "That's true. But Bonnie has always put him down and insulted him and..."  
Monique interrupted her, "Tara hasn't, and he politely refused her too."

"Tara?" Kim's head snapped up, her eyes flashing, "When did that blonde..."

"Chill, GF, be satisfied that Ron ignored her."

"Did he know you were watching?" Kim growled suspiciously.

"Nope, his back was to me."

Kim's eyes began to tear up, "He's...he's so...so wonderful I just..."

"Whoa, whoa, stop the waterworks, just tell me that tomorrow night your costume will totally fry his brain."

Kim sniffed, wiped her eyes and grinned, "I was going as a catholic school girl, but after I had to wipe the drool when I hinted at it, I changed my mind."

"C'mon girlfriend, spill, I told you what Felix and I are going as, so tell me about you and Ron."

Kim giggled, "It wouldn't have been possible, but Wade helped. The wade-bot will take Ron his costume tomorrow. It's a character I really had a crush on when I was younger."

"So, tell."

"Wellll..."

IV.

"Doc, there is no way I'm going to Karaoke night, no way."

Drakken grinned evilly, "Oh yes there is Shego."

The evil sidekick began snickering, "Right, **you** are going to force me? Oh, whatever shall I do?" Her hands lit up with green fire.

"Oh, force won't be needed, Shego, you'll come."

"And why would I do that?"

"Because it's in your contract, page 16, paragraph 5, subclauses 26 through 40."

Shego's firm jaw sagged. "W-what? I never...No way is that in there."

Drakken's grin was malevolence times ten. "Way, Shego, and I have just the costume."

With a final glare, Shego stormed out of the room, "Not until I check my copy you don't."

"But Shego, you'll look so cute as a sprout. Bwahahahaha!"

V.

"Rufus, buddy, she wouldn't really make me wear a tutu again, would she?"

"Hink, hmm, yep, yeah...tutu."

Ron glared at his naked pink pal, "Better, close the buck tooth grin, Rufus, because if I wear one, so do you."

Rufus's smile vanished, "Tutu...nooo."


End file.
